________ on a ________

There is a fabulous contest (for a super-fabulous prize) on the knitters anonymous blog. You have to come up with a ______ on a _______ saying (inspired by the movie "snakes on a plane") that involves an animal in or on an inanimate object.
Being the crafty English major that I am, I decided to play with the rules a bit. If my entries are invalid, that's okay. I'm just having fun.

First Entry:BOYFRIEND ON A DEADLINE!!!

Well, he's often quite the animal, and what is more inanimate than a deadline? (Oxford Canadian Dictionary definition of inanimate: "1. not animate; not endowed with life. 2. lifeless; showing no sign of life. 3. spiritless, dull; lacking energy and vitality") Deadlines not only lack life, they SUCK life!

More to come!